Confession…the Pastorman has really been an inspiration to me with regards to weight loss. I’ve watched his journey progress and I’ve watched him use that journey to grow in every way possible. I respect that about him.
As I read through my weight loss journal I realized that one year ago today I had given up on being healthy. I’ve wrestled with weight loss for the bulk of my life and I was just tired of the battle of the bulge. It was about then that I reread a blog post the Pastorman had written about his weight loss journey. I was inspired. His advice was from a godly perspective and so it resonated with a lot of what I had been wrestling through. I didn’t realize how much of my eating was tied up in my worship of everything BUT God. I decide to take his advice and apply it to my life just to see what would happen. I am quite the skeptic so I wasn’t expecting much to happen. Confession #2…I was wrong.
In the past year, we moved. I went to full time work. We sold our house. My hubby changed jobs. Schedule changes have been INSANE! And I’ve lost 23 pounds in the last year. Those stressors usually drive me to eating and self soothing with chocolate and fries, yet I was able to lose weight.
If I am honest, I will admit that part of me is tempted to feel bad, sad, sorry or regretful that it isn’t more. The bigger part of me, no pun intended, knows I am proud of my progress. I can honestly say that I have really learned how to wake up every day with the plan to do it better than yesterday, even if yesterday was REALLY bad. I have not done any day perfectly. Some days I have sweets that are not in the menu. Some days I have an order of fries. Often I have a diet coke, which isn’t good for me at all, but I make the choice. But every day, I set aside time to prepare my meals for the next day. I make a good choice and most days I stick to it.
I have learned to say no to my urges to eat unhealthy food. I can maintain that resolve for 3 days and if that urge is still there in 3 days, I give in. Hey, it’s 3 days more than it used to be, so I think that is progress.
I have learned to decide whether or not what I am about to eat is idol eating or not. I don’t always resist idol eating but I am now aware of it now. These are all huge steps of progress in my mind.
I know now that I can lose weight and that the power to do so lies within me. I think that is something I have not known before. I have to power to say no and I have the power to say yes. I can use that power however I want. Some days I use that power wisely, and some days I don’t. The win for me is…the days I choose wisely now outnumber the days I don’t.
Food is still a comfort factor, but I’ve also learned to see it as fuel. Fuel to do the things God has called me to do. If I am physically suffering as a result of my food choices, I am unable to focus on the work at hand. That thought keeps me focused…most days.
If you are interested in the blog you can check it out here. I’ve shared it before, but it is good stuff and I believe it is worth sharing again.
Until the next confession…