Today’s confession…I don’t like to be uncomfortable or out of control. One could call it a preference. I call it idolatry. Why? Because I will go to extreme lengths to maintain control and comfort. I will plan and scheme and almost diabolically organize to maintain my illusion of control and comfort. It’s a sick thing. I know there are those of you who will contradict me or try to tell me that I’m being a bit extreme. Please don’t let me off the hook. I live in my brain and I alone know how sick this issue has become for me. God also knows and He loves me regardless.
I’ve been referencing a book lately…You Can Change by Tim Chester. Some friends and I read through this together and I remember one of my sweet girlfriends lamenting that there was no step by step process to rid one’s self of such idols. I smiled because I felt the exact same way. It’s easy to identify something that has an ungodly place in your life. It’s easy to say…there it is! What isn’t easy is to know what to do with it everyday!
My sweet dear friend, today is the day I dreaded. The idols of my heart are back and threatening to regain their control in my life. There is no formula to follow. There is no chant, no mantra, no incantation to recite to ensure it’s exit. I find myself frustrated that even though I want it gone, it has returned. It has returned with ninja-like stealth. It was surprising to look up and see it there. But it has returned and I must deal with the vile adversary.
2 Corinthians reminds us that the weapons of spiritual warfare are not made of things we can see…they are made of things we cannot see and so such a battle requires faith. I must have faith in a God who is bigger than me and sovereign despite whatever pains and questions I may have today. I must choose to believe that God is sovereign. I must choose to believe that He will complete His good work in me. I must choose to believe that He won’t leave me or abandon me. I must choose to ask Him for help and then believe that He will give me that help. I must choose to believe. I’ve already called for reinforcements. Because I know that even though I think I can do this alone…I CAN’T!
United Hillsong sings a song “Shout Unto God” and I sing that song today. My enemy has been defeated…death couldn’t hold Jesus down! I will shout to God with a strong voice and with a voice of praise. I choose today to allow God to get the win on my day. It is my choice.